Carol Ann Duffy Writes More Shit

The Poet Laureate Carol Ann Duffy, has contributed to the efforts to help those stranded abroad by writing a lot of pointless shit.

Witness the genius.

The female poet said that she decided to write a poem about the volcano ash to give hope to those who are currently unable to get home.

We asked those stuck in various places all over Europe what they thought of Duffy's words. "If by 'helping us'", said Jake Lyndhall currently in Sunny Beach, Bulgaria, "she means making us more bored and depressed than we already were, then yeah, I suppose she has helped us.

"Other than that she's basically described something rather simplistic in a needlessly complicated manner."

Rachel Wiseman from Leeds, now in Athens said, "If any other person wrote a poem about a fucking ash cloud someone would tell them to go and get a CAT scan at their local hospital. But no, because it's Carol Ann-Up-Her-Own-Duffy then everyone thinks it's a sodding masterpiece and gives it repeat airtime on Radio 5."

Professor Paul Jackson from Stratton University has analysed the poem extensively since its release and commented, "This country is famous for its tradition and history of great literature. I read Silver Lining by Carol Ann Duffy and immediately heard the distant rumbling of Shakespeare, Milton and Orwell all doing fifteen thousand RPM in the respective graves.

"In a hundred years time Literature students worldwide will look at our the works across time and see the Renaissance had Hamlet and Paradise Lost, the Enlightenment had Frankenstein and Dracula and the 21st century had...a poem about people stuck in Zante.

"Thank you Carol Ann shitting Duffy!"

Meanwhile, millions of Britons are having a bloody great time legitimately sciving off work and sunning themselves by a pool for free.