Huge Shock as Man Proclaims "The Simpsons is Shit"

Uproar was caused on Tuesday night when Ken White, a 34 year old from Chester watched eight minutes of The Simpsons on Channel 4, before saying "Wait a second. This is a pile of shit!"

Mr. White's wife who was in the kitchen washing the dishes at the time heard what he said and was so shocked she dropped her best china plates. She immediately rang her closest friends asking them what she should do because her husband had just spoken out against The Simpsons. Within an hour the news had spread as far as Cornwall.

"Donkey Shite" says Jenson.

"I was just scared," she confessed, "I didn't know what to do. I didn't know whether he or even myself would be arrested or merely lynched by the local public."

Fortunately for the Whites the public were understanding after the initial shock, as Peter Jenson from Norwich testifies, "At first I was just astounded and slightly annoyed that someone thought The Simpsons wasn't very good. However, I then watched the rest of the episode he was referring to and realised that he was right. That show is now utter, utter donkey shite. And he had the balls to say it."

Professor Jackson, the head of Media Studies at the University of Stratton said, "The Simposons has had the all too familiar fate of spiralling from something that was extremely good to something that is about as funny as a baby's funeral. However, what is unique is that unlike other shows it has convinced people that it is still brilliant.

"This godlike status it achieved in the '80s and '90s posted it on a plinth so high that to criticise it was near blasphemy. That is why Mr. White's statement caused such a ripple of outrage at first, but actually he may have woken up an entire generation of people."

When questioned why he felt the need to make such comments, Mr. White said that it was not for controversial reasons, "I was just saying what I saw. Everyone else seemed to be charmed by it but I just sat down and realised that nearly all the jokes, especially the ones involving Marge and Lisa were not just unfunny but cringe worthy!

"It was then that I thought 'Why did they get greedy?' and the whole show just reminded me of a big fat tit being milked until it resembled a a punctured scrotum."

"All I can say is that it's a fucking good job Murdoch wasn't around in Shakespeare's day!"